Parenting is tough stuff. I know in
part after raising four kids. And now I see from a distance our sons and
daughters-in-law raising my grandchildren.
How do you build a house, a future
of adults from the precious gifts of children in the present?
My grandchildren left our house
yesterday (sorry Melissa, I keep saying my grandchildren). This morning I
opened my Bible to Proverbs 24 and my heart was filled with prayers for our own
sons who are now fathers. I prayed for our daughters-in-law who celebrated
Mother’s Day yesterday. And a prayed for the future of my grand-kids (oops, I
did it again).
“By
wisdom, a house is built,” Proverbs 24:3 says, “and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its
rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.” Proverbs is filled
with wisdom. Ten chapters earlier, Proverbs 14:1 says, “The wise woman builds her house…” and as a rule, women have the
greater degree of wisdom in regard to raising a family (and I might add a wise
husband would prove his own wisdom by admitting that!). When the book of
Proverbs personified wisdom, the writer used the feminine pronoun to embody
wisdom (Prov. 3:13-20, 4:7-9).
I find it amusing that the next
time wisdom is mentioned in Proverbs 24 is two verses later when the writer is
describing battles and war. “The wise
prevail through great power and those who have knowledge muster their strength.
Surely you need guidance to wage war, and victory is won through many
advisers,” Proverbs 24:5-6 says. Undoubtedly, the writer is speaking of
actual battles and war, but as I recall the battlefields of life often occur within a home.
So, what is wisdom? What is
understanding? How do we acquire knowledge so that the rooms of our homes and
more importantly the hearts of our children can “be filled with rare and
beautiful treasures”?
Heart wisdom. Wisdom is not just in
the mind, but in the heart and in the practice. It is not just the knowledge of
what to do, but the desire of doing it and the actual implementation of that
wisdom. Many times “wisdom” is translated as a “skill”, a finely honed practice
of a craft. Exodus 31:6 reads in the King James this way, “in the hearts of all
that are wise hearted I have put wisdom.” If your heart is wise, God will place
wisdom, and the ability to carry it out. The New American Standard Bible even
translates “wisdom” in this verse as “skill.” “…in the hearts of all who are
skillful I have put skill, that they may make all that I have commanded you.”
Life wisdom. Wisdom comes from life
experiences and the longer the life, the more experience we have. Job 12:12
says, “Is not wisdom found among the aged? Does not long life bring understanding?”
I have found that good judgment comes from experience and experience comes from
bad judgment! I have learned more from my mistakes than my successes. Eyes may
roll when an older person begins with “Well in my day…” Nevertheless, I will
attest that eyes shouldn’t roll, but rather widen with anticipation, and it
wouldn’t hurt for ears to listen and hearts to learn from the experiences which
life brings. No degree or diploma sounds louder than the school of hard knocks!
Fear brings wisdom. Fear of the
Lord is different than earthly fear. My name, Tim, means fear but my full name
means “fear of God.” To fear God means to honor God with reverence and respect.
I may “fear” the radar gun when held by the highway patrol, not because I
respect it or even the officer who holds it, but because I value my pocketbook.
But to honor and respect God is to value the good that He brings, in and of
Himself. Psalm 111:10 says, “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom;
all who follow his precepts have good understanding. To him belongs eternal
praise.”
Humility brings wisdom. Pride
brings disgrace, but humility bring wisdom, Proverbs 11:2 says. A wise person
seeks wisdom, but a foolish person shuns it. Ecclesiastes 7:19 states that
“Wisdom strengthen the wise.” Proverbs 9:9 says, “Instruct the wise, and they
will be wiser still.” I quote Scripture because the Word of God is what
contains wisdom, not my words.
Correction brings wisdom. Sometimes
a verbal warning is enough to bring wisdom, but most of the time, it is the
“rod of correction” which gets our utmost attention. Proverbs 29:15-17 says, “A
rod and a reprimand impart wisdom, but a child left undisciplined disgraces its
mother. When the wicked thrive, so does sin…Discipline your children, and they
will give you peace; they will bring you the delights you desire.”
God gives wisdom. Ultimately, it is
God who brings wisdom. There are too many verses in the Bible to list that
truth, but James 1:5 perhaps says it best. “If any of you lacks wisdom, you
should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will
be given to you.” Proverbs 2 also says “The Lord gives wisdom.” I ask God for
wisdom for myself, for my children, and for my church, for He alone is the
perfect house-builder. And I ask for wisdom for MY grand-kids!
